#mathew barzal 13

[hockeyonthebuds]

Happy 27 Mat Barzal ❤️

[v6quewrlds]

⁎⠀┉⠀no nut november masterlist!

since i didn't do a kinktober series this year, i decided to do a no nut november series instead! some days are subject to change but this masterlist will be updated to reflect any changes as the month goes on. all works listed are restricted to an 18+ audience. each fic will have its own tags and warnings as i deem appropriate. minors do not interact.

‎ ‎ ⁎⠀┉⠀main masterlist, #ficrecs, current wips.

‎ ‎ ‎ ⸻ day one: andrei svechnikov (nov. 01)

‎ ‎ ‎ ⸻ day two: tee higgins (nov. 04)

‎ ‎ ‎ ⸻ day three: lando norris (nov. 06)

‎ ‎ ‎ ⸻ day four: devin booker (nov. 08)

‎ ‎ ‎ ⸻ day five: mathew barzal (nov. 11)

‎ ‎ ‎ ⸻ day six: joe burrow (nov. 13)

‎ ‎ ‎ ⸻ day seven: jude bellingham (nov. 15)

‎ ‎ ‎ ⸻ day eight: carlos sainz jr. (nov. 18)

‎ ‎ ‎ ⸻ day nine: andrei iosivas (nov. 22)

‎ ‎ ‎ ⸻ day ten: trent alexander-arnold (nov. 26)

‎ ‎ ‎ ⸻ day eleven: mason mount (nov. 29)

[hauntedppgpaints]

Jersey numbers faceoff

Vote for which player you think would win in a fight between other players wearing that number! Follow the 'numbers faceoff' tag on my blog to see the other polls.

[bitchinbarzal]

Okay but like can we please get the part two of Mat and Mama’s fight 🥺 that broke my heart

Mat had been riddled with guilt all day long. After practice when he’d returned home to relieve Lola, your nanny of her duties with the kids.

Ivy hadn’t said much to him, silently avoiding him.

When he put Ryder down for his afternoon nap he found Ivy sitting in the living room watching Bluey on the tv.

“Hey Princess”

She looks up at him from her pile of blankets, clutching her Sparky stuffed teddy

“Hi daddy” she mumbles, her eyes never leave the screen.

He sits next to her, arm draped over the back of the couch.

“You wanna talk about what’s going on in that lil head of yours?” Mat asks, poking her head which pulls a giggle from Ivy.

She looks up at him, your eyes looking back at him as she asked “Are you and mommy not love each other anymore?”

Mat’s heart broke and he let out a shaky breath “Of course not baby, I love mommy so much”

“Why do you shout then?”

“I don’t know princess… I guess I’m just upset with mommy sometimes and that’s ok! You get upset with Ry sometimes, right?” He nudges her and she shrugs

“I guess”

“Well sometimes me and mommy get mad at one another but that doesn’t mean I don’t love her” he explains and Ivy hums in response

“I love your mommy so much ives, no matter what! Momma could be so mad at me and I’m still gonna love her so so much because she’s my best friend in the whole wide world”

The little girls head quirks to the side “she’s your best friend? I thought that was uncle Tito?”

Mat’s head shakes “Mama’s my best friend forever”

Ivy seems satisfied with his answer and goes back to her show.

That night there’s a game at the rock so you won’t be home until late. The kids don’t typically go to devils games unless one of the wives or girlfriends take them, it’s a somewhat established rule that Mathew should not attend Devils games as it can be seen as disrespectful to the islanders organization.

So it was a pleasant surprise to Ivy when Mat tells her to get ready after dinner, both kids are dressed in a devils jersey with their last name on it and the number 13.

Ryder’s in a carrier on Mathew’s chest while he sits in the stands next to a very excited Ivy who keeps telling everyone “My mommy’s on the bench! She’s a doctor!”

And “I know them! That’s my uncle Nico!”

There were a few confused and excited hockey fans when they saw him. The in house event team were having a field day once the puck dropped.

The jumbotron panned over to your family at one point and you were too busy watching the game so Nathan shouted

“Hey Barzal! Tell ivy we love the support!”

You frown until Jesper points you up to the jumbo tron. There is Mat, Ivy and Ryder all smiling and Ivy’s holding a sign that says

Go Devils, Go! + Mommy!

You smile and shake your head “That family of mine”

Once the game ends you make your way to the medical room to see to those boys choosing to come down who ends up being Vitek, Jesper and Nico.

“I saw the kids out there tonight” Nico mumbles while you do stretches on his leg.

You smile “Yeah i saw them on the jumbotron, Mat must’ve brought them — I told them to go home Ry would’ve been asleep second period and Ivy looked like she was so close to sleep”

It’s late by the time you get home, the light in your bedroom is the only one on. You shrug off your coat and take off your shoes before tiptoeing up to Ivy’s room and kissing her sleeping head then into Ryder’s room to do the same.

By the time you enter your bedroom Mat is sitting up in bed waiting for you. You don’t say anything, slipping into the bathroom to shower and changing into your pyjamas.

Once you’re finished and re-enter your bedroom Mathew is still sitting there just looking at you.

“What’re you staring at?” You question, slipping in under the sheets.

Mat smiles “My beautiful wife”

You Huff “If that’s your way of apologizing, it’s shitty”

He frowns, pulling your hand into his and angling his body towards you

“You’re my best friend, I love you and I’m sorry”

His words, while not long were heavy and you knew he meant them.

You don’t respond, he doesn’t need a reply. Instead you let go of his hand and shimmy down so your head is rested on the pillow, Mat does the same.

You’re both facing one another and he leans over to kiss you slow, your emotions pour into the simple kiss.

Every ounce of anger, sadness, lust and happiness poured into each other. Mat’s hand gripped the back of your thigh and urged you to flip on top of him, straddling his waist.

Once the two of you pulled away, giggling like school children You mumbled “Thank You for bringing them tonight, it meant the world to me”

“Lou’s definitely gonna kick my ass tomorrow, but it’s worth it — you’re worth it baby”

“I love you, mat”

“I love you, angel”

[hockey-fics]

Missing Piece ~ Mathew Barzal 

Summary: You’re supposed to move on from your first love, but six years later you’re still struggling with it. And maybe you aren’t the only one. 

Warnings: Drinking

Word Count: ~4,700

Love isn’t easy or simple. Love is complicated and sometimes messy. Love can bring out the best in you but it can also bring out the worst. It forces you to deal with issues you didn’t want to deal with, issues you maybe didn’t even know you had. Jealousy, insecurity, distrust. 

Your first love was even more intricate. It’s the first time you feel that true commitment to a person when you know you would do anything and everything for them. The first time you give yourself over to someone completely, give them the power to break your heart into a million pieces. The first time you found your person. The person you don’t want to be without, the person you feel safe and comfortable with. The person who brings out the best parts of you and the person who will be by your side at your worst. 

But not every love story has a happy ending. 

Your first love started in middle school. Mathew asked you to go with him to the seventh-grade dance. Of course, you said yes. You were 12 and you were ecstatic that your crush had asked you to the dance. 

At 13 you had your first kiss. It was on the playground at the park down the road from your house. You had gone there with Mathew after school one Tuesday in October. It was awkward and strange but you loved every second of it. 

At 14 Mathew asked you officially to be his girlfriend. You said yes without a second of hesitation. He took you to a movie that Friday. Or rather, your parents drove you to the movie theatre, where you met up with Mat and he bought you a ticket and popcorn. You held hands throughout the movie and didn’t pay attention for even a second. You spent the length of the movie worried about if you were holding his hand too hard or not hard enough or if your hand was too clammy or stiff.

At 16 Mathew moved away and you didn’t know how to handle it. But you loved Mat as much as you could have at that time so you navigated a long-distance relationship as best you could at that age. He was only a few hours away and between weekend trips and summers together you managed the relationship rather well. 

At 21 things changed. Mat moved thousands of kilometres away and your ability to navigate long-distance deteriorated quickly. There was a three-hour time difference. Weekend trips to see each other nearly ceased entirely. You would go days with nothing more than a few texts here and there. By the time you were done with your day and had time to call Mathew, he would be heading to bed. When he had time to talk in the morning you were still asleep. 

So you broke up. It was mutual, at least that’s what you told everyone. It was you who had brought up the idea. Mat argued against it, promised to try harder, find more time to talk and see each other. But you knew it wasn’t realistic. You hadn’t drifted apart due to a lack of effort. It wasn’t extra effort that would bring you together. 

You were devastated. Beyond devastated. You were a mess for long enough that you had grown embarrassed over the number of tears you had shed, the number of nights you had spent curled up in bed, and the social plans you had cancelled to stay in and wallow in your sadness. 

Eventually, you pulled yourself together enough to patch your life back up. You finished your last few years of university. You started going on dates again, even though none of them ever compared to being with Mat. You did your best to put that part of your life behind you. 

But you were supposed to move on entirely from your first love. You knew that. You knew with time you were supposed to stop thinking about it, about him. You were supposed to go weeks, or months, without thinking back to the days of your first love. 

You weren’t supposed to long to have that person, that feeling, back in your life. You weren’t supposed to flash back to vivid memories of the past, of memories from when you were still wrapped up in that love. 

You thought the hole he had left in your life when the two of you broke up would eventually be filled. With friends and hobbies, school and a career. But no matter how busy you kept yourself, no matter how hard you tried to fill that hole, it always seemed to be there. 

December 22, 2022

You’re sitting in the driveway, Budget rental car idling in the cold winter night. December 22nd. You were back at your childhood home for Christmas. You should be happy. But every time you came home there was a feeling of nostalgia that didn’t fill you with warmth or happiness, it felt sad and bitter. 

“Are we going to go in?”

Whipping your head to the right with a sharp inhale your eyes focus on Ben. Ben. You two had only been together for four months. It felt far too early for him to be joining your family for Christmas but when he asked to come you didn’t really know how to say no. So here you were, with your practically brand new boyfriend, sitting in the driveway of your childhood family home thinking about all the times you had been in that exact place with Mat. 

“Oh, um, yeah,” you mutter, turning the car off before climbing out into the cold night. Dragging your suitcases up to the front door you head in, your parents at the front door only a few seconds later. 

“Hi hunny,” your mom greets, throwing her arms around you. 

“Hey, mom.” Pulling back you look over at Ben. “This is Ben,” you tell her, your apprehension clear in your voice. 

“Hi Ben, it’s lovely to meet you.” She pulls him in for a hug, their bodies rigid and tense. “How was the flight?”

“Pretty good,” you tell her with a shrug. “Nothing crazy happened so I guess I can’t complain.”

“Well, dinner is almost ready, the bed is made upstairs,” your mom says, eyes flicking back and forth from you to Ben and back to you. 

You wanted the night to go well, you really did. You wanted Ben to fit in like a missing piece in your family. But it didn’t and he didn’t fit. It was awkward and uncomfortable. After dinner you cleaned the kitchen with your mom while Ben sat in the living room with your dad and the house was so quiet you could hear their conversation, or rather, their lack of conversation altogether. 

You lay awake in bed that night till Ben falls asleep, till the house is dark and quiet. Slipping out of your room and down the stairs you head out to the car in the driveway. You weren’t even sure where you were going, or what you were planning on doing. But you needed to get out of your head and you hoped that getting out of the house might make that happen. 

Eventually, you find yourself in front of the 24-hour convenience store you used to frequent for late-night snacks and drinks. The year they began selling wine and beer only increased the frequency of trips, youthful giggling as you played a game of ‘who looks the oldest’ in someone's beat-up Honda Civic in the parking lot of the convenience store. 

Sighing you climb out of the car, heading into the store. The lights are fluorescent and bright, too bright. The store is empty aside from the man sitting behind the counter, barely even looking up from his phone when you entered the building. Strolling down the aisles you let your eyes scan the shelves of chips and candy, overpriced loaves of Wonder bread and tiny jars of peanut butter. 

The bell above the door jingles but it barely registers for you, your mind racing with thoughts, with memories. 

“Your parents still don’t keep junk food in the house?”

Twirling around your eyes land on the last person you expected to find in that convenience store at 12:30am. If you had you sure as hell wouldn’t have been there in sweatpants and a hoodie so old you were fairly sure he had seen you in when you were still a teenager. “Mat,” you whisper. “You’re back in town early.” 

“Yeah, we got lucky this year, had a game yesterday and I flew back this afternoon,” Mat explains. “When’d you get here?”

“This afternoon.” You’re fidgeting with the strings on your hoodie, staring over at him. “How’ve you been?”

“Not bad. How are you? Happy to be home?”

“Uh,” you mutter, inhaling deeply. “Yeah, I guess as happy to be home as I can be if I’m using this place as an excuse to get out of the house.”

“That bad, hey?” Mat chuckles. 

“I mean, it could be better. But more importantly, what is hockey superstar Mathew Barzal doing at the 24-hour Stop and Shop in the middle of the night?”

“Couldn’t sleep.”

Your eyes fall to the bag of chips he was holding, looking back up at him with a teasing smile. “And you thought a bag of Lays salt and vinegar chips would fix that?”

“Probably not.” Matt shrugs, laughing under his breath. Reaching over he picks up a bottle of wine sitting on the shelf across from where you were standing. “This might though.”

“Oh no, it’s sad enough to be back in this place, don’t make it worse by drinking alone.”

Mat chuckles, reaching over for a second bottle, and thrusting it into your empty hands. “So don’t let me drink alone.”

You knew you should say no. There were a million and one reasons why you should say no. You had broken up over 6 years ago. It took you years to move on and you weren’t sure even now you really were. You had a boyfriend now. You had a boyfriend now who was asleep in your family’s home. 

“Alright,” you state, nodding in agreement, despite your mind screaming at you to say no, to put the wine away. 

So the two of you take the bottles of wine and Mat’s bag of salt and vinegar chips to the counter and you let him pay for all of it despite your objection. Outside you climb into your car, agreeing to meet Mat at his house. It seemed safer to go there, your own house seemed off the table with Ben asleep in your parent’s guest room. 

When you pull into the driveway Mat is waiting outside for you, the bottles of wine tucked under one arm. Following him inside the two of you sneak down to the finished basement that had been a common hangout during your childhood and teenage years. 

Once you’re settled on the couch in the basement with a glass of wine in your hand you turn your focus back to Mat. “How have things been? It’s been a while since we talked.”

“It has,” Matt agrees, taking a sip of the white wine in his glass. “I’ve been pretty good, I guess. Kinda just the same.”

“I don’t think you get to make your life seem so boring,” you tease. “I’m glad you’ve been doing well though. Still enjoying New York?”

“Yeah, I mean, it’s starting to feel like it’s home more than here now, you know?”

Nodding slowly you take a sip of your wine, staring down into it for a few seconds. “Yeah, I guess.”

“Are you still living out here? You graduated, right?”

“Yeah, I finished my degree a couple years ago,” you tell him with a soft smile. You were still following each other on social media and you were sure that had to be how he knew that. “I moved out to Toronto after graduating.”

“Toronto?” Mat shifts slightly in his seat, taking another gulp of the sickly sweet, cheap wine. “That’s a big move.”

“I didn’t want to stay out here forever, wanted to see a new place for a while.”

“How are you liking it out there?”

Sighing quietly you give him a little shrug. “It’s been okay, it was hard for a while to not know anyone out there. But I’m slowly settling in, meeting new people.”

“You don’t sound like you like it that much.”

Laughing softly you take another drink, finishing off your first glass of wine. “I do,” you insist, reaching over and pouring yourself another glass of wine. You knew the only reason you were hesitating about it was because you were sitting here with Mat now and it made Toronto feel distant and cold. 

As your conversation grows less intense with each glass of wine you find yourself loosening up, laughing and joking with Mat like the two of you hadn’t spent the last six years apart. You weren’t even paying attention to the time, had stopped worrying about Ben waking up and finding your side of the bed empty. Nothing else seemed to matter while you were sitting there with Mat. 

“Any new women in your life?” you ask, the wine blurring your inhibitions, no longer worrying if that question would come across as strange and jealous. 

Mat chuckles, shaking his head. “No, hasn’t really been for awhile. What about you?”

“No, I’m still mostly just interested in men.” 

“Very funny,” Mat laughs, waiting for you to go on regardless of your attempt to deflect the question away from you. 

“Um,” you hum, taking another large drink from your glass. “Yeah, I, um, I’m seeing someone.”

Mat falls silent, nodding slowly as he looks across the room, not making eye contact for a few minutes. “Oh, um, congratulations.”

Laughing sarcastically you set your glass down, nervously running your clammy hands over your thighs. You didn’t want that fact to change Mat’s perspective of you. You didn’t want him to push you away because of that. “We haven’t been together long,” you inform him. “I don’t know if we’re going to be.”

“Why’s that?”

“I just feel like we should still be in a honeymoon phase of our relationship but it’s already really hard. And he doesn’t fit in with my family, which isn’t a dealbreaker but it’s not ideal, you know?”

“He’s met your family?” Mat mumbles. 

Your heart was hammering in your chest now, not wanting to admit what you were about to say. But you couldn’t lie to him. “He’s here with me for Christmas.”

“I thought…didn’t you say you haven’t been together long?” Mat asks, his voice quiet and deflated. 

You can’t help but laugh at that, it was a very fair question to ask and you were a little embarrassed to admit that it was and he was still here regardless. “We haven’t, it’s been like four months. He asked to come out here with me for Christmas and I didn’t know how to say no.”

Mat’s deflated expression is broken by a breath of laughter. “You couldn’t say no? You didn’t want him to come?”

“No,” you exclaim, shaking your head. “I really didn’t.”

“Do you even like this guy?” 

Glancing around the room you let out a loud breath. “I don’t know, Mat,” you admit. “I’ve been trying. I did in the beginning but now I think I’m just trying to force it to work.”

“Doesn’t sound great for four months in,” Mat points out. “Did you also not know how to say no to me all those times I came over for Christmas with your family?” Mat jokes. 

“You know I wanted you there,” you tell him with a soft smile. “I always wanted you around.”

“So why didn’t you want him to come?” Mat asks, seemingly looking for a specific answer though you weren’t sure what it was. 

“Because I don’t love him,” you say simply. “And I love you.”

The room falls silent as the two of you realize what you had just said, your face flushing hot and your heart hammering hard. “I loved you,” you correct, a blatant lie but you couldn’t admit that somewhere deep inside you were still in love with Mat. 

“I should probably head home,” you say suddenly, getting to your feet and pulling your phone out to get an Uber or taxi or any other way you could figure out to get out of there. 

“Woah, hey, are you okay?” Mat asks, getting up and stepping over to you, his hand on your lower back. His touch was gentle and hesitant like he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to do it. 

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine,” you whisper, your hands shaking slightly as you open your Uber app. 

“Look at me.” Mat places his hands on your arms, turning you to face him. “I know what you meant, you don’t have to run away.”

“What did I mean, Mat?” you whisper, looking up into his eyes. 

“That we loved each other when I was coming to your house for Christmas.”

You hesitate, knowing you should just leave it at that. But you couldn’t, shaking your head slightly. “I think I might still be in love with you.”

Mat stares down at you for a few seconds, uncertainty clear on his face. Before you have the chance to say or do anything he’s pulling you closer, leaning down and pressing his lips to yours. 

“Mat,” you whisper, pulling back the second his lips touch yours. “I can’t do this right now.”

“I’m sorry,” he mutters, stepping back quickly, one hand rubbing the back of his neck. “Fuck, I’m sorry, you’re in a relationship, I shouldn’t have…I’m so sorry.”

“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” you assure him. “I should probably go home though.”

Mat nods, walking you up to the door once your Uber was on the way. He stands in the entryway, shoulder against the wall as he watches you pull your shoes on. 

“Wait,” he says as you stand up, moving towards the door. Turning back to face him you wait for him to go on. “I still love you too.”

You’re frozen in place, speechless for too long. “I’ll talk to you later,” you finally say, slipping out of the front door and hurrying down to the Uber idling at the bottom of the driveway. The ride is quiet and you’re glad your driver was refraining from a conversation, giving you time to think over the events of the night. 

When you get back home you sneak in as quietly as you can to avoid waking anyone up. But by the time you get into your room, you realize you didn’t need to be so worried, finding Ben wide awake. 

“Where were you?”

Sighing you tug your hoodie off, tossing it onto the chair in the corner of the room. “I just went to see a friend.”

“You snuck out in the middle of the night to go visit a friend?” Ben presses, clearly and rightfully suspicious. 

“I couldn’t sleep and I didn’t want to wake you up,” you explain, only partly lying. 

“Who were you with?”

“Why are you interrogating me right now?” you snap, arms folding over your chest. 

“Because you fucking snuck out to go see someone in the middle of the night and you’re obviously drunk, I think I deserve to know where you were and who you were with.”

“I was with Mat,” you snap. “I ran into him in the store and went back to his place to catch up. It’s not a big deal now can you just go back to sleep.”

“Your ex Mat?” Ben mutters. 

“Yes,” you whisper, glancing down at the ground. 

“Did you sleep with him?”

“Oh my god,” you groan, shaking your head. “No, I didn’t do anything with him. We hung out and had some wine.”

“That’s bullshit,” Ben declares. “Tell me the truth.”

“I just did,” you mutter, though it wasn’t exactly the truth. 

“I don’t believe you.”

You take a deep breath, glancing up at the ceiling before looking back over at him. “You want to know the fucking truth? I’m still in love with him. Yeah, he tried to kiss me but I stopped it. I don’t know what you want from me, Ben, but whatever it is I really don’t think that I can give it to you.”

“I should never have come here,” Ben states, his voice cold and harsh. 

Laughing sarcastically you lean against the dresser behind you, putting even more distance between you and him. “No, you shouldn’t have. I didn’t even fucking want you to, I don’t know why you would even ask. We’ve been together for like four months.” 

You knew you were being harsh, you knew you were in the wrong. But the culmination of everything from the last 12 hours was spewing out of you with visceral anger. You didn’t want him there, your family barely wanted him there, he had already made your first dinner with your family weird and uncomfortable and you couldn’t help but put all of that on him. 

Ben nods, walking across the room to begin reorganizing his suitcase. “Well, I’ll be out of here tomorrow so I don’t ruin your Christmas or get in the way of you and your ex.”

Sighing you walk to the edge of the bed, sitting down and watching him for a few minutes. 

“You had to know this wasn’t going to work out, Ben,” you finally say, voice quiet and soft now. 

“Actually I didn’t,” Ben snaps, turning around to look at you. “I actually have feelings for you and it doesn’t feel great to know you were in love with your ex this entire time.”

“I’m sorry,” you whisper, looking down at the ground. “I know it doesn’t make it better but I really didn’t plan or expect to see him, now or ever.”

“It really doesn’t, but thanks,” Ben mutters, walking back to the bed to sit back down. Pulling his phone out the two of you fall into an uncomfortable silence while he finds the next available flight back to Toronto. 

Eventually, you decide to get some sleep, the sky already bright outside. The next time you wake up Ben was already gone and you weren’t sure if you were relieved by that or if you felt you should have said a more concrete goodbye. 

Downstairs you find your parents in the living room, curling up on the end of the couch, waiting for someone else to say something first. 

“I’m sorry,” your mom finally says and you look over at her with furrowed eyebrows. 

“Sorry?” you ask. 

“You and Ben, I’m sorry you two broke up.”

“Oh,” you mumble, shrugging. “It’s, um, not a big deal.”

“You went and saw Mathew?” your mom asks. 

“He told you that?” you ask in disbelief. “I didn’t go see him, I couldn’t sleep so I went for a drive and stopped at the convenience store for a snack and I ran into him. He wanted to catch up so I went over to his place, it’s not like I planned to see him.”

Your mom nods, clearly unsure about your words. But your mom also loved Mat and you knew that even if you had specifically gone to see him she probably wouldn’t have been that upset about it. “Well as long as you’re okay then I’ll be honest and I think it’s for the best. You didn’t seem happy with him.”

Sighing you turn your attention to the Christmas Hallmark movie that was playing on the TV. “Yeah,” you whisper, knowing she was right. 

You spend the rest of the day with your parents, watching Christmas movies and eating so many snacks you didn’t even need to think about cooking a single meal that day. 

Most of Christmas Eve had slipped by quickly but you couldn’t keep your mind off of Mat. Couldn’t stop thinking about the night you spent together. He had told you that he loved you and you had left without saying anything else. You left that night with him thinking you were staying in a relationship with Ben.

After dinner you pick up your keys and purse, telling your parents you would be home soon. Maybe this was a mistake. Maybe everything you had done since being home had been a mistake. But you don’t stop, you don’t turn around, you keep driving till you’re sitting in the driveway of Mat’s childhood home. 

The driveway is slippery with freshly fallen snow, the air sharp against your skin. When you get to the front door you consider turning around and heading home, pretending you had never driven across town for this. But you knock on the door before you can talk yourself out of it. 

When the door is pulled open you’re hit with a gust of warm air, tinged with the scent of Christmas baking. Your eyes focus on Mat, standing in front of you in a hoodie and sweats, hair a mess, surprise written on his face. “Hey,” he breathes out, one hand still on the door. 

Stepping closer you lean up, hands on either side of his face as you press your lips against his. It’s filled with emotion and all the words you didn’t know how to say. His arms are around your body, tugging you into the house and fumbling the door closed behind you without so much as pulling back for a second. Your hands move down, one tangled in his hair, the other grasping at his hoodie like you were scared that he would be gone again if you were to let go. 

When you finally pull back you leave one hand grasping his hoodie, the other falling to rest on his chest. “Hi,” you whisper. 

“Hi,” Matt replies, his hands on your waist. “What-.”

“I broke up with him,” you interrupt, wanting to get any thoughts that you might be cheating on your partner out of Mat’s head. “Or I guess we broke up, he found out about the other night and wasn’t happy.” 

Mat nods slowly, waiting for you to go on. But you didn’t know what else to say. You didn’t even know why you were there. 

“Do you want to come in for a bit?” Mat suggests, pushing your jacket down your arms, and hanging it on one of the hooks by the door. 

“Okay,” you agree, letting him take your hand and pull you up into his room. The same room you had snuck into many times before, but back then it was because you were teenagers and spending time alone behind a closed door was strictly off-limits. “Straight to the bedroom, hey?”

Mat chuckles shutting the door behind the two of you before making his way to sit on the edge of the bed. “Just figured you wouldn’t want to have whatever conversation we’re about to have in the living room with my family.”

“You’re right about that,” you comment, walking over and lifting one knee onto the edge of the bed, sitting next to him, your body turned to face him. “So,” you whisper, hoping he would take the reins on the conversation. 

“I want to try again,” Mat blurts, not turning his head to look at you as he says it. 

“Try what again?” 

“Being together. We live closer now and I still love you six years later, I think…I think I want us to try and make it work again.”

You’re stunned by his words, staring at him speechlessly. It’s not that you hadn’t thought about it. Not only had you thought about it before this trip home but you had thought about it every moment since you saw Mat in the convenience store. 

“Is that a no?” Mat mutters. 

“No, uh,” you begin nervously, shaking your head. “No, it’s not. I mean, yes…yes, I want that.”

Mat pulls you closer, kissing you again, gently, passionately. “I love you,” Mat whispers against your lips. 

And you whispered it right back to him, contentment deep in your soul. Finally, the piece in the puzzle that had been missing for so long seemed to be back in place. 

[ryeriy]

number 13

warnings: none

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mentions: @nowandkei @67-angelofthelordme-67 @trevorzegrizz @huggy-hischier94

A roaring crowd is all I can hear right now. People pushing and shoving others trying to get to the "front" of the line. Even though we are all going to the same place. Inside the UBS Arena. All of this is just to watch the New York Islanders play tonight. The game started at 7:00 pm and it was only 5:30 and everyone was swarming, pushing, and shoving. As if we were in the apocalypse. It took me thirty minutes just to get inside the arena.

After finally getting into the arena I just decided to walk around. It was just me tonight at the game. I had seats in the one hundred. This was my first Islanders game and I was excited about it. The first time I could watch my boyfriend play. Mathew Barzal. I was even wearing a New York Islanders jersey with the number 13 on it with his name on the back. His jersey. Keeping to myself just walking through the crowd of people to try and locate my seat. I took a few pictures of my surroundings trying to soak it in before it becomes loud, packed, and even louder. I didn't know much or even care much about hockey before. But now I'm dating a guy who plays it professionally, I've started to care more about it.

Before the game started I got some popcorn to snack on during the game. You could tell it was getting close to warm-ups based on how the crowd was acting. One word to describe it. Rowdy. I was close enough to the glass where I could go up and watch the warm-ups. Mathew smiled at me a few times. I took a bunch of videos and pictures of Mathew. I know this means a lot for me to come to his game.

1...2...3...

It's dropped.

The puck dropped. The game started. The crowd got wild. Then everyone got up and screamed. It was intense. I didn't know what was going on. All I could do was try and look for Mathew. In search for someone with the number 13 on their back with white, orange, and blue. Then there he was. My boyfriend, Mathew Barzal. On the ice. I couldn't help but cheer for him. Soon enough he was skating it down the ice going towards the goal and....goal! Mathew scored!

I jumped up and down and cheered. "Yay! Mathew!" I clapped, jumped, screamed, and yelled for him. I was just so excited I saw his goal. The lady sitting next to me looked at me and laughed. "One of those fan girls?" She says to me. I move my head to face her. I was so mad. I just wanted to blurt out I was his girlfriend but she would never believe it and me and Mathew wanted to keep it on the low and not let people know and I respected that. "Yeah, just excited!" I said to the lady.

I was just in admiration of him. I felt like it was just me and him in the whole arena and everything stopped for a second. All I could see was him and hear him and all he could see was me and hear me. I smiled at him, seeing him smile back. That smile made me snap out of it. Everyone else reappeared in my environment as long as the sounds. Now all I could think about is that is the number 13 I love. Mathew Barzal.

The Islanders won that night. I and Mathew both went home happy. He texted me where I should go to wait for him and I followed his instructions as much as I can trying not to get lost. I saw a sign on the door saying locker room and I knew this is where I had to be. Waiting outside the door for Mathew to walk out any second. I could hear his voice from the door and soon enough the door swung open and it was Mathew. In his suit with his stuff in a long duffle bag filled with hockey equipment. "Well look at you!" Mathew says while giving me a side hug with his arm pulling me close to him. He had his duffle bag swung on his other shoulder. "Wearing my jersey!" He said.

All I could do was chuckle a bit before speaking. "Yep, must be your good luck charm. I mean you won tonight." I said while smiling at him. As we began to walk out of the arena and out to the parking lot where we had both parked. "Of course, you are my good luck charm! That's why I always need you around!" He says while kissing me on the forehead with his arm around me still. "I'll just have to come to all of your games wearing this," I say and he laughed a little bit with me. "I love you." He says to me. "I love you too, Mathew." I smile at him and stop walking for a moment. Pausing and kissing him softly before pulling away, smiling and we continued walking out.

[starry-hughes]

I know nothing about mr barzal but I’m enjoying reading your posts about him :D

MR MATHEW BARZAL IS A HOCKEY PLAYER FOR THE NEW YORK ISLANDERS FROM CANADA. HE WEARS #13. HE JUST TURNED 26. VERY FAST SKATER

MY FIRST LOVE

MY BABY

MY DUMB BABY

i’m drunk.

[goalhofer]

2023-24 New York Islanders Roster

Wingers

#10 Simon Holmström (Tranås Stad, Sweden)

#15 Cal Clutterbuck (Welland, Ontario) A

#16 Julien Gauthier (Montreal, Quebec)*

#17 Matt Martin (Windsor, Ontario)

#18 Pierre Engvall (Ljungby Stad, Sweden)

#20 Hudson Fasching (Apple Valley, Minnesota)

#21 Kyle Palmieri (Smithtown, New York)

#26 Oliver Wahlström (Cumberland, Maine)

#27 Anders Lee (Mendota Heights, Minnesota) C

#29 Brock Nelson (Warroad, Minnesota) A

#59 Daylan Kuefler (Red Deer, Alberta)**

Centers

#13 Mathew Barzal (Coquitlam, British Columbia)

#14 Bo Horvat (West Elgin Township, Ontario)

#44 Jean-Gabriel Pageau (Gatineau, Quebec)

#53 Casey Cizikas (Toronto, Ontario)

Defensemen

#3 Adam Pelech (Toronto, Ontario)

#4 Samuel Bolduc (Laval, Quebec)**

#6 Ryan Pulock (Grandview Municipality, Manitoba)

#8 Noah Dobson (Summerside, Prince Edward Island)

#24 Scott Mayfield (Webster Groves, Missouri)

#25 Sebastian Aho (Umeå Stad, Sweden)

#28 Alexander Romanov (Moscow, Russia)

Goalies

#30 Ilya Sorokin (Mezhdurechensk, Russia)

#40 Semyon Varlamov (Samara, Russia)

[katieshook02]

Was tagged by @intoanotherworld23 and thought it would be fun to do, even tho i dont have that many followers.

im tagging anyone who comes across this and wants to do it :)

Favorite movie of all time: its a tie between Star Wars Episode 3: Revenge of the Sith (any stars wars movie tbh) Surfs Up, Marley & Me, The Hangover and Cars

Favorite color: used to be blue but now i think its yellow.

Where you’d like to travel: USA: Nashville, Memphis, Hawaii, New York (i have a whole checklist for there) Connecticut (my dad grew up there), South Carolina, and Wyoming (Yellowstone specifically)

Outside USA: Ireland, Poland, Italy, France, Greece, Bahamas, Brazil, Spain, The Netherlands, Germany, Switzerland, New Zealand, Fiji, and Rome.

Favorite music artist/band: Taylor Swift, Bruno Mars, Queen, Elvis Presley, Gun n Roses, and Shawn Mendes, ill stop there bc thats not even a quarter of them.

What I like to drink: Dr Pepper.

Favorite season: Summer

Hobbies: eating, crying, sleeping, listening to music, performing world tours in my room at 1 am, reading, cuddling my cats, and playing minecraft by myself (it’s therapeutic ok)

Animal I’m obsessed with: otters, puffins, dolphins, cats, dogs, and sea turtles.

What celebrity you’d like to meet: Meryl Streep, Julie Andrews, Anne Hathaway, Taylor Swift, Zachary Levi, Zach Galifinakis, Steve Carrell, Miles Teller, Bradley Cooper, Jim Carrey, Tony Goldwyn, Mathew Barzal (only putting him on here bc he didnt get to ask me what my name was when he gave me a puck last year)

Random fact about me: i grew up in a foreign country (Costa Rica) where i lived from ages 4 to 13, went to a private montessori school and can speak fluent spanish.

[ohmyeyesmyeyes]

fourth anniversary

mat barzal x famous f!reader

summary: your annual 'soft launch' post comes around, only this time fans get a little more than they bargained for

warnings: swearing, soft launch, hints at sex, let's ignore the misspelling of 'anniversary' at the beginning, reader has tats

i'm a sucker for soft launches guys i'm sorry but i have no range on social media au's 🤷

liked by glenpowell, camilamorrone and 962,851 others

ynofficial: "flowers? linen? fruit? silk? I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHAT THE TRADITIONAL THEME IS FOR A FOURTH WEDDING ANNIVERSARY IS AND ALEXA IS TELLING ME SOMETHING DIFFERENT TO GOOGLE AND GOOGLE IS TELLING ME DIFFERENT THINGS!!!! WHY IS THIS SO HARD?" - M

view all comments

fan1: YOU'RE MARRIED????? WTF

fan2: so those soft launches were wedding anniversary posts? i'm unwell babe

fan3: i think i just shat my heart out in mcdonalds

fan4: damn

fan5: so we got marriage??? and a full post??? with a caption??? that proves he has personality??? and three full photos???

fan6: fr we're getting fed

fan7: I DONT EVEN KNOW WHO HE IS OR WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE BUT I JUST KNOW HE'S DELICIOUSLY DISGUSTINGLY GORGEOUS

ynofficial: i can confirm this, yes 🙋

fan8: have you not seen her track record of partners? the girl's got taste

fan9: PREACH SHE DOES

fan10: LMAO HER ANSWER 💀💀💀

fan: THIS IS SOFT LAUNCH 5 BUT THEIR ANNIVERSARY IS 4???

liked by titobeauvi91, noahschnapp aand 135,861 others

barzal97: happy 4th 💐🍉

view all comments

fan11: barzy hasn't posted since october and then he slams this

fan12: so many hearts broke today 💔💔 (mine did)

fan13: babe i thought we agreed not today!!

fan14: this better be an april fools joke or something

fan15: it's march?????

fan16: that cake was from barzy to me, sorry guys

fan17: THE TATS OH MY GOD

fan18: they look so familiar

fan19: that's because ynofficial has the exact same ones

fan20: wtf

fan21: holy shit she does

fan22: this is 4 years too bro

fan23: are they????

fan24: I THINK SO

liked by taylorswift, alexachung and 991,286 others

ynofficial: i get mystified by how this city screams your name 🌸🚏

view all comments

fan25: i came from stalking twitter and i don't think it's talked about enough that her husband might be mat barzal

fan26: we love us some taylor swift love songs 💜

fan27: i'm dying over here

fan28: GIVE ME SIGNNNNN

comments on this post have been restricted

liked by nhl, trevorzegras and 74,813 others

barzal97: he shoots and he scores

view all comments

fan29: you didn't this weekend bro

fan30: shrieking bc of this

fan31: i spy an innuendo 👀

fan32: i think i burnt my eyes this is too hot

fan33: y'all mind if my boy slays real quick?

fan34: islanders and yankees don't add up

fan35: Y/N POSTED ONE LITERALLY SIMILAR TEN MINUTES AGO

ynofficial posted to their story...

liked by ynofficial, titobeauvi91 and 231,286 others

barzal97: she keeps calling me bro, like, my dude, we've been hitched 4 years

view all comments

fan36: I DID NOT EXPECT BARZY TO BE THE ONE TO SOFT LAUNCH THIS RELATIONSHIP WHAT

fan37: was this intentional?

fan38: holy fuck my god are you two attractive

fan39: i'm crying does mat not tan or something??

ynofficial: baffled. offended. insulted. TILL DEATH DO US APART, MY FRIEND. THERE IS NO RETURN POLICY. THE RETURN POLICY IS THE D-WORD.

barzal97: death?

ynofficial: (divorce)

fan40: what was that?

fan41: that was morbid

fan42: nah they're actually so gorgeous together

fan43: fr i think they suit each other so well

liked by barzal97, pierrgasly and 999,135 others

ynofficial: the man, the myth, the legend, the husband, the broski, the gremlin, the hottie...i give you my husband AKA mathew barzal AKA #13

view all comments

fan44: husband first hockey player second. fair dos.

fan45: i'm jealous of both of you

fan46: why the look of disapproval in the first pic?

barzal97: she called me buddy 😔

fan47: yeah you win. idk what the competition was, but you win it

fan48: he looks completely different in all of these 😭

fan49: how did you guys keep your entire relationship a secret?? between you you're practically wanted by the entire state of new york

ynofficial: hush money

barzal97: blackmail

titobeauvi91: they're spies

fan50: forget ny they're now wanted by the fbi

fan51: if you ever have kids the rest of the world ain't gonna stand a chance

ynofficial: 👀

barzal97: wdym 👀?

fan52: 👀

ynofficial: 👀

fan53: WHAT IS GOING ON RN??? IS THERE A BABY???

ynofficial: nugget

barzal97 just posted to their story...

[caption: fyi, THIS is nugget]

[mondieumat]

tell me whos ur favorite boy and why is it this dude who wears number 13 in the new york islanders hockey team?

via twitter 

[bitchinbarzal]

Mama B’s name is Y/N Barzal, she always wears a ‘13’ pendant, would go to Isles games a lot, has Mathew all over her social media, and her dumbass of a husband is still like, “I feel like people don’t know you’re my wife. I haven’t claimed you enough you know?” 😭

EVERYTHING she is, is her husband 😭 and he’s still like…. I don’t even think she fancies me

[art-and-the-hockeys]

wallpapers • mathew barzal w/ puppy + various styles (iphone 13)

Requested by @threemorekisses​

Credits of the wallpapers’ elements and style go to their respective owners. I only assembled them to make the wallpapers.

like & reblog if you use

[ryeriy]

Hi guys! This is my nhl master list. If you have any requests please send them in! Clicking on my navigation post will have it on there! Requests are currently open!

ANNOUNCEMENTS: I'm back!!! So I'll start be taking requests and I've now added Formula 1 for something I write for!

navigation post

Last updated 3/27/24

❤️ - valentines day collection

🎃 - halloween collection

🎄 - christmas day/eve collection

🎉 - limited events collection

smut = [s]

angst = [a]

Mathew Barzal

you look lonely

champagne problems [a]

I think he knows

number 13

a little surprise 🎃

cheer you up

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Connor Bedard

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Jamie Drysdale

just come lay down

surprise

It's just a game

beach day

candy, please? 🎃

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Ethan Edwards

can i tell you something?

no more secrets

twins 🎃

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Mark Estapa

I'll keep you company

halloween 🎃

haunted 🎃

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Adam Fantilli

masterpiece 🎃

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Luca Fantilli

hockey and hoes 🎃

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Nico Hischier

what are the odds

ever so cold 🎃

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Jack Hughes

this one is for you

I got you

hufflepuff [s]

late night fires

you're no lover of mine [a]

captain's sister [s] 2

opening night

my fashionista 🎃

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Luke Hughes

It's nice to have a friend ❤️

cuddles and kisses

welcome to jersey

kisses and cookies 🎃

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Quinn Hughes

cornelia street [a]

keep me warm 🎃

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Auston Matthews

be my valentine ❤️

save your tears

vegas

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Mitch Marner

that one

all star

god I love you ❤️

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Owen Power

10 things i love about you ❤️

don't go

tis the season 🎃

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Alex Turcotte

baby fever

what happens in los angeles stays in los angeles [s]

mirrorball

far from home 🎃

☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ○ °☆ ° ○ ° ○ ° ☆

Trevor Zegras

I'm just glad you're okay

can i bring a friend?

paper rings ❤️

post-game interviews

sing it

don't you remember?

pumpkin spice and everything nice 🎃

[lonelyreputation]

omg i saw ur writing for barzal !!! ‘how about a hug, hm?’ seems so cute <3

Ahh yes I’m gonna try!!! Also probably going to re-post it on my hockey blog (@matwith1t) so !!! Let’s give it a whirl! First Mat with one t writing! Woot!

Post-Grad Uncertainties 

Prompt: “how about a hug, hm?” // prompt list // Fluff, brief mention of anxiety 

Mat Barzal x Reader // WC: 1.5k

You were trying your hardest to enjoy your last few months of university. Trying to savor all of the “free time” you had before that time would eventually be taken up by a nine to five job with an hour for lunch. Trying to enjoy midnight study sessions in the library with your friends, as you all laughed and reminisced about sophomore year instead of actually studying. And trying to enjoy attending your boyfriend’s hockey games while wearing his New York Islanders sweatshirt––your lucky charm––in hopes he scored a goal.

You were trying really hard to enjoy the good times. But the looming thought of post-grad employment always lingered in the back of your head. 

It was there when you went to a coffee shop with Mat early in the morning before his practice. There when you were in the library with your friends, being sushed by other students for laughing too loud. And there when Mat had scored a goal and pointed up at you in the stands.

Over winter break, when you went home to visit for a bit before returning to New York, it had been the first question everyone asked you when they found out you were about to be a second semester senior. So, they would hesitantly start out, what are your plans for after graduation? 

Who was even hiring? When did you have to have applications in by? Where would that career take you? What job?

With your laptop open and notebooks spread out across Mat’s kitchen table, you were at a loss. You decided to take a study break and search for jobs on LinkedIn, contact people who you met by networking to see if they knew any companies hiring, and even stooped as low as to calling your stringent dad for advice. But nothing was proving helpful and you buried your face in your hands, prepared to have a break down.

You were about to give up and get back to taking notes when you heard the jingle of keys from outside and then saw the door open. And in the midst of feeling an abundance of anxiety, you smiled as Mat awkwardly maneuvered through the door clutching his keys, phone, and bulky practice bag. He kicked the door shut with his foot and dropped his bag with a heavy sigh.

Without a care, he threw his keys on top of his practice bag––no matter how many times you told him it would just be easier to hang them up right when he walked through the door––and looked up from his phone. A smile instantly stretched across his face as he walked into the kitchen.

“I didn’t know you’d be here,” he said to you as he pulled two glasses from a cabinet and filled them up with water.

You smiled appreciatively as he came over and set a water down in front of you and took the seat next to you, “Couldn’t concentrate anywhere,” you nervously tapped your index finger on the table, “I can leave if you want to be alone––”

Mat's laugh calmed down every nerve you felt before he had arrived. “I gave you a key, remember?” He said with a smirk as he took a sip of water.

Bashfully, you tucked your chin down into your chest as you felt the same butterflies reappear in your stomach like they had two weeks ago when Mat gave you a key to his apartment. 

“What’re you studying now?” Mat picked up one of your textbooks and flipped through the pages, making sure he marked the page you were on with his thumb so he wouldn’t lose your place, “Always too smart for me. Everyone will want you after you graduate.”

You tried letting out laugh, tried to see the humor behind his encouraging comment, but all it did was bring up every insecurity you had about not finding a job.

The breathy laugh you tried to let out ended up getting caught in your throat. The prickling behind your eyes became too strong. And with the scratchiness you felt on the back of your throat…You knew what was about to happen.

Screwing your eyes shut tight, you brought a hand up to cover your mouth as you hiccuped. 

“Y/n?” Mat softly cooed your name as he placed a gentle hand on your forearm, “Hey, what’s up?”

And that’s all it took for your composure to come undone. The tears broke their dam and flowed as if there was nothing that could stop them. Your shoulders slightly shook as you openly cried in front of your boyfriend into the palms of your hands. Mat had said nothing wrong, he was just being the encouraging boyfriend he promised to be since day one, but his soft words and caring tone of voice somehow triggered a switch.

Not saying a thing, Mat moved his chair right up next to yours. He had one hand gently rubbing up and down your back, and the other hand was still on your forearm; his fingertips softly drawing patterns on your arm. He let you get all of your emotions out, because he knew from previous experience that if you were to explain yourself, it would come out in choppy phrases between your cries.

“Deep breaths,” he whispered in your ear as you felt him rest his chin on your shoulder, “In, one…two…three…Out, four…five…six…” He guided you through a few more breathing exercises until your cries were nonexistent.

He sat there, chin still comfortably resting on your shoulder, for a few more minutes of silence. You appreciated that he didn’t try to remove your hands from your face since you still had a few more silent tears leaking from the corners of your eyes.

“Talk to me,” Mat whispered.

With one last shaky breath, you lifted your head up from your hands and ripped away the last of your tears with the heels of your palm, “Do you really think everyone will want to hire me after I graduate?”

Mat lifted his chin from your shoulder and tilted his head with furrowed eyebrows, “Uh, yeah,” he said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, “You’re perfect.”

With a small laugh, you swatted his chest, but he caught your hand in his before it could fall into your lap. You avoided his gaze as you looked down at the keyboard of your laptop, “Everything is just so hard,” you said in a quiet voice, “Making sure you have the right experience, making sure you have the right connections, having the job pay decently, trying not to hate it, checking the location of the job––And did you know that some companies will just ghost you––”

“Whoa, whoa,” Mat calmly said when he noticed you starting to get worked up again. You took a deep breath and he smiled at you, “Everything will work out.”

You felt your shoulders drop, “But what if it doesn’t,” your voice cracked, “My internship hasn’t mentioned anything about it potentially rolling into full time. And what if I––”

“Whether your internship offers you a job, whether you find a job and they want you right after you graduate, or you find a job six months or even a year after you graduate,” You slowly picked your head up to see Mat with the most hopeful look in his eyes, “It’ll be just what you want because you know not to settle for anything less than you deserve.” He wiggled his eyebrows at you and he triumphantly smiled when he saw a smile tug at the corners of your lips, “Whatever the job may be, whenever the job comes, it’ll all work out.”

You took a sip of water before looking at Mat and sniffling, “You think so?” 

He squeezed your hand, “I know so.”

Nodding your head, you let out a deep breath and finally showed Mat a real smile, “You’re the best.”

Mat rolled his eyes, “I know.” You let out a scoff, but before you could pull your hand away from his, he stood up and tugged you up with him, “How about a hug, hm?”

Without any hesitation, you fell into his chest and leaned your head on the soft material of his sweatshirt. Like he had done earlier, his hands reassuringly rubbed up and down your back, causing you to let up on all of the pent up anxiety you felt about searching for jobs. 

You felt Mat press a kiss to the top of your head as he mumbled, “How about a movie and some cuddling?"

"I could use a study break,” you nodded into his chest.

Mat’s arms dropped from around you, as he picked up your hand, and dragged you into the living room. You plopped down on the couch as he grabbed the remote off the coffee table, and soon enough, there was a movie from Netflix that neither of you cared about as you rested your head on Mat’s chest and easily fell asleep to the steady beating of his heart.

[kingbeezer]

mathew barzal